Fake Forgiveness!
HA! A friend of mine told me a very wise statement, "Truth that hurts is better than a fake honesty," I totally agree with her on that one. I mean, don't you wanna know the truth? ..I do.., even though there are many times that I've wished the answers would have been different or the answers would have made me smile instead of mad or crying.
Many times, we allowed ourselves to enjoy the moment of "fake honesty". We knew they lied but we go along with it because it makes us feel better about ourselves, our situation, our relationship. We ignore the importance of "truth" for the sake of "drama-free" zone. But, do you really wanna enjoy the things that are not suppose to be enjoyable? Do you really wanna lie to yourself?
Social Media, such as Facebook and Twitter, are a very great place to stay in touch with other people and also a very dangerous place as well. People are at war with each other based on status updates, pictures war and relationship statuses, *Laughing Out Loud*, you laughed because you know it is true!
I deleted a lot of people because it was just way too much drama. I am on Facebook because most of my families and friends are in the other part of the world and Facebook makes it easier to communicate or shared my pictures (instead of sending the pictures via emails to hundreds of them). But, some people are just way to sensitive and take it too seriously. The funny thing is that many of them are being too coward to confront people when they see them, but "very brave" updating their statuses to explain what they are feeling about them. Why can't you just go to these people or email them privately or call them and tell them the problem instead of pouring your soul out on Facebook? It is ridiculous to read how people are attacking each other on their statuses. The anger, the jealousy, the fake "like" and the competition to proved that you are better than them. Facebook is good for staying in touch with people you know, not a war zone. Facebook is a good place to encourage each other with your words, to entertained each others with your silly pictures or beautiful view from your vacations, not to showing off that you are richer or better than others. I guess it is all coming back to yourself, how you see things and how you take it. Some take it the wrong way and others just have fun with it.
People also forgot that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, whether we like it, agree with it or not. Social media has lost its purpose and gained popularity for other purposes, such as "being fake" (from fake happiness, social status, pictures, feelings, etc).
Let's go back to fake forgiveness!
Many times when people said, "I forgive you!", they are still mad at the person, but they do it anyway so it will not burdened them. Many times people also said those words not because they really forgive that person, but they said that to make them feel better about themselves. I mean, yes forgiveness will make you free, but if you don't really forgive them, it does not give you freedom, it gives you another burden because you lied to covered your true feeling. It is better to admit that you could not forgive (yet) than to say I forgive but actually I don't.
I am a believer in forgiveness as a way to make peace with yourself, but it does not mean faking it. I hate when people say they forgave but they said that because they wanted other people to see them as the nice, noble and better person. Yes, you are not the one who did the bad things on the first place, but to lie to other people, does not make you a better person either. You could lie to people, but you could not lie to God and yourself. If you really wanna be free, you should really forgives. If you still need time, it is better to admit it than to lie.
A friend of mine called me a couple of months ago, admitting that she used my name to win an argument with her friend. I found it very disturbing for a big girl to use me as an example to someone that I do not even know exists. She admitted that she had to lie to win the stupid argument and that she was sorry. I was offended! I mean, if you wanted to use my name, at least have a dignity to use it for the right reason, truthfully. But, she did that because she could not be herself, she had to use someone else's life to cover for her own insecurity. Faking and lying about anything does not make you a better person, no matter what the reasons or excuses behind it. The worst part is I know when she told me the story, she did not really regret it. She was not sorry that she used my name, she called me because she was scared that her friend would ask me personally and therefore her name will came up as the "story teller" , LOL, sad, isn't it? but it is also very true that we tend to do something "nice" because we are trying to save our own face.
Admitting that you are sorry or that you forgave, even though you did not mean it, but you said it anyway to make you feel better about yourself or so that other people will see you as a good, noble and better person, is a wrong reason.
If you wanna do something nice and noble, do it for the right reason. The right reason for this issue would be "To Forgive" or to say "I Am Sorry" and really mean it.
You could run but your could not hide (from God, your past, and yourself).
xoxo,
Lindsay