Saturday, June 4, 2011

Hot Button


YIKES!

Hot Button is something that elicits a strong emotional response or reaction. It is could also means a controversial subject or issue that is likely to arouse strong emotions.

Hot Button's issues could rise between one person to another. We are all human and we have different upbringing, background and values in life. Somehow, sometime, in our process to become who we are today. There are things that we have seen, experienced, learned, passed and moved on. But, there are things that are still lingering on our mind and heart that we still could not get it over with (or moved on). Its either something that we think we are right, wrong, could fix it, or still not decided what to do about it. It is also something that has an emotional connection to it, that makes us really sensitive about that issue. Some has one hot button and others has more than one. Which one are you?


Someone say that Life Is A Choice and I totally agree with this statement. Because I think that nobody deserve to live a life they wished to live, but the one who is living his or her own life. In life, we also have to interact with other people because we are a social creature. We will always need someone else to complete our survival on this earth. Even if you are the world's number 1 loner, you still need others to live. But, sometimes the closest people are those who always and often push the hot button in us.

Even though, we have been warning those people to stop talking about it or just simply shut up, they kept saying it. Over and over again, when they have a chance to open their mouth. I don't know why certain people thinks they have every right to say how to live other people's life. I also don't mean this as something bad. Sometimes, it is good to remind others to live their life for their own good. There is a different between helping them to be better and making them feeling bad about their lives. There is a different between an advice and an order. There is a different between sharing your feeling with them and pushing your own agenda attacking their feelings.


Sometimes just because you are a friend, neighbor or a family member, it doesn't give you any right to keep pushing the same button over and over again. Especially,when the person you are trying to "grill" warned you about it. When someone say, "I get it" or "Stop saying that" or simply just leave the room with an angry face on it. Then, you should get the point that they don't like to talk about that issue. I am not talking about teenager's going through that phase of their teenage life. I am talking about adults who thinks they have every right to dictate other adult how to live their life when it has been decided. When that other person you are trying to "grilled" already made up their mind about that issue, then STOP "suggesting" or saying it over and over again, like we are dumb. We get your point, but too bad, we decided to go our way. After all, this is my life!

How to deal with people who keep pushing your hot buttons?
Here are my advice :

1. Avoid them

2. Let them know how you feel about the issue, in a polite manner. If they still trying to make their agenda become yours, then do number 1.

3. Think about their advice, if you think you are not ready or theirs is not going to work for your life. Then, do it your own way. Have confidence in yourself!

4. Knowing that this is YOUR life and therefor other people must respect your decision. Again, if their advice is for your own good, then think about it.

We all need other people to survive in this world. But, if those people brings nothing but bad energy to your life, then find another friends. If that is a family member, then call or visit them on holidays only LOL.

I hope that those who are reading this posting understand that we were once in both side. We were on the side who pushed the hot button, we were also on the other side as the one who were being pushed. We all know what and how it feels like to be on both sides. Sometimes, just because you are older or related to someone, it doesn't give you FULL ACCESS to dictate their lives. People made their own choice and decision for their lives, respect that.


Sometimes silence is golden, you know. Keep asking the same question in a very disturbing, pushing and hurtful statement, is an insanity to expect a result you would want to see. If you think by keep pushing it, the other person will change their mind. Think again! You might just bought your own ticket to be an outsider in their lives.

Respect other people, even if it is your own child. Giving your advice is good, but that is it. No more pushing hot buttons. Which part of this is a sensitive issue for me?, that you don't understand? LOL!

Images Via Google

Have a great weekend readers. I know I will ;)
XOXO,
Lindsay

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